My name is Laina Turner-Molaski. It depends on where I’m at, what I’m doing, and how I feel at the moment as to whom you are talking to. I’m not really suffering from multiple personality disorder, although I sometimes feel like it. But rather a self induced craziness of trying to follow my passions all of which are at times at very far ends of the spectrum.
My goals for 2010 are simple. To finally publish my fiction book, to achieve some better inner peace, and to have a better work/life balance. The first, of hopefully many. fiction book came out March 2nd, 2010 which has been thrilling, although now I need to actually sell it. Some of my other goals are not so black and white. I like things neat, tidy, and measurable but I have to allow myself to be ok with the fact that it’s not always possible to have things that way. What I have to ask myself is if I have made progress in these areas and if I have learned anything from the experience, and I have. What I have learned is that life isn’t neat and tidy. It can be, but it also can be messy and dirty which is what makes it life. I have spent most of my life trying to conform and putting aspects of my life in neat and tidy boxes. The business woman box, the wife box, the mother box, the teacher box, the writer box to name a few and once I got done with those there wasn’t much left for the Laina box. In fact, I got to where I wasn’t even sure what should be in the Laina box as I had lost part of her in the search to be all of those other things.
I think we often make decisions and do things that we feel we should be doing rather than what we want to do. Maybe because what we want might not be the practical course of action but you can’t always be practical. As I started this self discovery I decided to take the plunge and do what I wanted even if it was scary as hell and might land me in the poor house.
My focus this year is what I want. Not what I think I should be doing. I have the confidence that I can be successful at the path I WANT to go and I will.
I am who I am…no excuses and no disclaimers.
I’m done trying to be perfect. I am finally going to embrace my reality. What can you do to embrace yours?
Laina
So join the movement and be crazy with me www.chiczofrenic.com.
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